Wednesdays have never been more Fab!

Need I say more?

So come on over tonite.

I'll have treats!

p.s. and peanut m&m's for you, Hope.

Bon Appetit!

Loved Julie & Julia!
As soon as this bright and charming movie was over,
I pulled out my phone, clicked on the Amazon app,
and ordered this intriguing book.
I can't wait to delve into it.
Beef Bourguignon, here I come!

Brain shortage

OK, so my mom bought tickets for her and me

to go to Florida to visit my Aunt in Orlando.

Super exciting!

But then I decided to also take a couple of classes during the Summer.

So like a good and diligent student,

I made sure the dates of my final and midterm did not conflict.

My tests are set for Saturday, August 29.

Perfect, because I leave on the 18th and get back on the 23rd, right?

I requested my time off way in advance

and planned my homework schedule

so I wouldn't have too much to do on my vacay.

Well, on the 17th I awoke at 7 am to check in online.

It wouldn't let me.

"You may not check in more than 24 hrs in advance."

OK, our flight must leave at 7:30 am, so I wait and try again.

"You may not check in more than 24 hrs in advance."

What?

I check my email to look at times and I had the times correct.

But the dates...

now they were another story.

Aug 25th through the 29th.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am seriously that lame-brained.

I called my mom in a panic, thinking she is on her way to Phoenix.

Can't get a hold of her, so I leave a message.

I decide to bite down and pay the extra $300

to purchase tix leaving on the 18th.

It is my fault, after all, not my mom's.

Well, it turns out my mother had the correct dates all along,

so I paid $300 for nuthin'.

But those dates conflicted with my exams!

So I had to change the flights to leave on Sept 1st

and my poor mother had to talk to her manager about

changing her vacation dates.

I told her to tell the tale of her "special" daughter.

Crikey! How mentally defective am I?

Anyway, it all has worked out:

My brother and his baby are coming along also,

so it will be our first Family Vacation since high school.

I'm still excited.

A little embarrassed, but excited.

To Purge is to Breathe...

Now don't get all excited.
I'm not talking about that kinda purging.
Ewww!
Today was a productive day off:
I got some clothes altered
I finished my last two essays for my Bio class
I disconnected my computer and all electronics
I took apart my desk in order to send back a get one that doesn't fall apart
(funny how it took almost a quarter of the time it took me to put it together)
I put together a clothes rack
I went through my closet and got rid of anything I don't (or won't) wear
I went through some papers and recycled what I don't need anymore
I went through some photos and smiled and laughed and cried
I went though all our blankets...
I got rid of 3 of his blankets...
sending them to DI...
But I still have his nasal spray...
his Bajio punch card...
his broken Treo...
his last pair of shoes...
not ready to give those up...
But I feel lighter.
A little at a time.

Fierce!

Way Hot!
Christian Siriano, our Project Runway Doll,
goes slummin' for Payless ShoeSource.
Gotta love the hot mess.
These beauties don't make a dent to my bank account either @$35 a pop.
And the ankle boots...
Oh la la!

Blew me away!

I adore Science fiction, thanks to my brainy husband.

And this movie did not disappoint.
Go here to read my review on "District 9"

It was killa!

(the movie, not my review.)

I'm not nearly as verbose as Matt was.

But I'm willing to give it a try.

Tangible Memories

www.storypatchquilts.com

My lovely and super talented Sister-in-Law
made me this beautiful quilt made up of Matt's shirts.
Each shirt tells a story:

He wore the bright orange on our 1st date...
He had on the burgundy shirt the day I fell in love with him...
He wore the blue vertical stripe at Kate's wedding...
The lavender one was worn at our wedding...
He wore the brown horizontal stripe I bought him all the time, it's so worn...
I loved him in the red horizontal stripe...
He looked so handsome in his navy "metro" shirt...
All his Conservatory shirts...
His "No, I will not fix your computer" and "Five Bucks Coffee" statement shirts...

I am so grateful to Cindy.
I feel like I still have a little piece of him with me, however superficial it is.
I'll take whatever I can get.
These Tangible Memories of mine...

Bryce Thompson Arboretum

Meg and I went to The Bryce Thompson Arboretum today.
It was a beautiful summer day,
overcast and slight showers on and off all morning.


A good day to enjoy nature.



Matt had taken me there the first month of his courting me.
It really is one of my favorite dates.
It was so unique and out of the blue.
I wouldn't have expected it from him.
Which made me love it even more.
And him.

Finally...

the perfect Red.

Duwop has a new lipstick,

"Private Red"

It's a color changing lipstick that morphs into each woman's perfect shade of Red.

It's temporarily out of stock at sephora.com, but I'm gonna try the shop.

Time to get your mad-men on.

I miss him...

My hand literally aches to touch his face.

Oh, how he hated that...

He would always ask me why I had to touch his face all the time.

He would get so frustrated.

But I couldn't help myself.

It was just the cutest face.

And I kinda liked getting him all frustrated.

He barely ever lost his cool.

And in spite of all the face touching, he still married me.

I honestly don't know how I tricked him,

but whatever I did worked.

Poor guy.

I think Sundays are the hardest.

I loved our lazy Sundays:

church

napping

watching iron chef

star trek

paula dean

Every so often I would glance at him to find him watching me.

I'd say "What?"

He would simply say "You're cute."

He was such a silly goose.

And my heart breaks each day knowing I can't touch him.

It's so hard.

Hard to keep going forward when there are days when I just want to stop.

Just close my eyes and find that the world just stopped.

Give me time to breath.

I really hate going on,

waking each day,

learning new things,

planning a future...

A future without him,

without our home,

without our children,

without our dog...

The worst is this anger I feel that is directed at nobody.

It just sits on my soul.

I pray to Heavenly Father for some peace.

Hopefully someday it will come.

I'm still waiting...

Ahhhh....

Am so in love with this...

August 14 2009

Will have:
1. Popcorn
2. Dr. Pepper
3. Sour Patch Kids
4. Waterproof mascara
5. Tissues
6. My best girls

Perfect!

My First

Kay, so I'm 12 yrs old.
Wanna know who my first crush was besides Atticus Finch?

This guy.


I think it was the dimples that did it.
Yum.
My first and only beefcake crush.
And then I heard him speak.
Beginning of the end.
Forgive my shallowness?

"You give your cheeks a rosy stain..."

I have a secret love affair with cheek and lip stains.

It really is the best idea, especially living in AZ.

It's just too darn hot to wear anything too heavy here.

I started using Benefit's Benetint in '01.

I loved it, the rosy hint on my lips and cheeks.

And so began my 5 yr long affair.

And then came my real love, Matt.

And he HATED it.

He despised the rose water taste.

So, with a heavy heavy, I bid adieu.

To Benetint, not Matt.

Just to clarify.

See?

That's how much I loved my Boo.

I gave up MAKE UP for him.

Heavy, I know.

But then about 2 yrs ago, we were at the mall,

(See, that's how I know he loved me: he took me shopping)

and I was in my mecca, Sephora.

I came across this little tube of wonder,

Lorac Sheer Wash.

LOVED IT!

It was perfect.

More rosy than Benetint (which is good for my coloring)

but none of the rose water taste.

Needless to say, Boo loved it too.

Well, now I'm on a budget (or trying to be)

so Lorac is out for a while.

But Target, my other mecca, came through.

CG Outlast lip stain.

Not as versatile as Lorac, but many more colors.

I just have to swipe it on, dab a little aquaphor for moisture and off I go.

Oh, I am such a girly-girl.

When I get a little more $ in my budget, I want to try this Duwop one.

It's definitely on my "I Wanna" list.

A love of small towns...

I finally got to see what the much touted Pioneer Day festiveties were all about.
And I loved them!
Pics and stories to come.
Promise.

All in the name of Science

So I had a lab due for my Environmental Biology class today.
It dealt with seed dispersal.
I had to see how far some seeds in my Biology kit would travel in wind, water and by animal.
Well, the only animal I have access to is Zerk, Lincoln's cat.
The exact instructions were
"Do one other test such as throwing the seed against a furry/hairy animal.
Did it stick? Describe what you did and the results."
So that's what I did.
Or tried to do.
The darn cat wouldn't let me!!
He got all offended that I would even try.
He just looked at me, lazily opening one eye.
Then he just walked away, and I swear he rolled his eyes at me.
What a tool!!
How's that for results?!

Summer Fun...

in these Steve Madden San Frann's is undeniable!

However, the price on these Merona Eleora's is attainable.

I have them in Hot Pink and Chartreuse.

2 for the price of 1.

Can't beat that.

D'oh!

So I was at Ocean Blue tonight with Meg and Beth.
Yum!
I was putting some delicious Fruity Pebbles on my
Key Lime and Pineapple sorbet concoction,
when these two gents next to me ask if cereal on Fro-Yo is good.
"Dude, it is so good, Yo. For realsies."
Yeah.
That was my answer.
I said this in public.
How old am I again?
These poor guys just looked at me.
I could totally read their thought bubbles:
"Look at this middle-aged woman trying to be hip. Pathetic."
I can't help it, though.
I like colorful language.
It's fun, Yo.
I gots the 'tude that's got nothin' to do with age.
So bring it!

Mmmmm...

Smells like Starbursts!!
Meg did my hair and had fun infusing my curlies with this deliciousness!!
I love new hair.
But I love new hair products even more!!

Summer Toes

You wanna know what screams summer to me?
Bright traffic-stopping toes!
I present:
Madame President
brought to you by Sephora by OPI
Delish!
and Ambitious.
What say you?

New Title...Same Goal

Kay, so it's coming on to 6 months.
Crazy how time flies, huh?
Life is hard and so unfair sometimes.
We all complain about all our hardships and our struggles.
But I don't want to do that anymore.
I don't want to focus on the crap that we are given.
Yesterday, as I sat outside in the hot balmy air
watching the night sky light up with all the
colors of the rainbow in honor of our country's Independence,
I decided to liberate myself.
These past 6 months have been a prison
in which I so desperately wanted to dwell and disappear.

Do you wake up in the morning and need help to lift your head?
Do you read obituaries and feel jealous of the dead?
It's like living on a cliff side not knowing when you'll dive.
Do you know, do you know what it's like to die alive?
When the world that once had color fades to white and gray and black.
When tomorrow terrifies you, but you'll die if you look back.
You don't know.
I know you don't know.
You say that you're hurting, it sure doesn't show.
You don't know.
It lays me so low. When you say let go, but I say you don't know.
The sensation that you're screaming, but you never make a sound.
Or the feeling that you're falling, but you never hit the ground.
It just keeps on rushing at you day by day by day by day.
You don't know, you don't know what it's like to live that way.
Like a refugee, a fugitive, forever on the run.
If it gets me it will kill me, but I don't know what I've done.
-Next to Normal:Brian Yorkey/Tom Kitt

The future is like a great massive abyss.
And is scares the hell out of me.
I feel like I am standing at the precipice of Life
and everyone is behind me, nudging me forward, crowding me...
I know I have to keep putting one foot in front of the other,
but I don't think I'm ready to take the leap.
I just want to stay in this moment a little bit longer.
But the problem is that this moment is not
the happiest moment I could have hoped for.
In fact, it downright sucks.
But it is my moment.
So I will make it happy.
With all the little things this world has to offer.
I will continue to be the girl that makes a wish on the first evening star,
the girl who loves to blow on a dandelion
and send the fluff floating into the world,
the girl who devours romance novels and firmly believes they are non-fiction.
The happiest moments in my 29 years of Life have been with Matt.
I will find my Happiness again:
in Watermelon painted toes
a new book
singing at the top of my lungs (off-key)
getting a Degree
new shoes
playing with Kate's puppy
Rock Band
maybe writing?
I will find my Matt again.

So let's begin this Odyssey down the Yellow Brick Road.
Let's find the Wizard.